30 thoughts everyone has the first time they see the David

By Virginia Fay, Michelle Hayman and Sara Wiseman

  1. …Does that look a little small?
    1small
  2. Why are his hands so massive?
  3. Seriously, they’re like baseball gloves.
  4. How the eff long did this take?
  5. I’m exhausted just looking at this.
    5exhausted
  6. I don’t have enough patience to make a sandwich let alone carve something out of stone.
  7. My ex-boyfriend looks kind of like him?
  8. …Right? He looks like that, right?
    8exboyfriend
  9. It was created in 1501? When was that?
  10. Did they just see me take that photo?
  11. Oh, crap! They saw me.
    11sawme
  12. Who made this?
  13. Michelangelo. Didn’t he do the Mona Lisa too?
    Michelangelo
  14. Wait, no. That was in the “DaVinci Code” = Obviously DaVinci
  15. Can we talk about Tom Hanks’ hair in that movie? Disgusting.
    Tom-Hanks-Best-Wallpapers-3
  16. But, no, this guy did the Sistine Chapel.
  17. God, isn’t it so annoying when they shush you in there?
  18. Like, your shushes are louder than any conversation I was having. Rude.
    17shushes
  19. Look at how interested this old guy is in the David. So cultured.
  20. He probably doesn’t know anything about art and needs to relax.
  21. Boy, David looks kind of hot and bothered doesn’t he?
    20hotandbothered
  22. What do you think David’s diet was?
  23. Straight protein?
  24. I bet he would have loved Chipotle, given the opportunity.
  25. God, I want Chipotle.
    24chipotle
  26. I should probably at least get a pizza instead.
  27. David could totally put away a lot of pizza, with that size.
    fat-david
  28. If I Instagram the picture I took, will the authorities find out somehow?
  29. You can’t get retroactively banned from a museum, can you?
  30. What else is even in this museum?
    29whatelse